There is evidence and there is faith. What does Unconditional Love fall under? Is it a factual phenomenon or is it something people believe in? As in faith, just because you STRONGLY believe it, it is ultimately "truth"?
Watching: Blue Valentine
Thursday, October 2, 2014
Wednesday, October 1, 2014
A page from his book
I have a major flaw. I admit it. I've had it since I was young, and although I am aware that it's a problem, I can't seem to control myself. I am an incredibly defensive human being. And not only do I simply get defensive, I get nasty defensive.
I've noticed that in the past, if a boyfriend was not paying attention to me for some reason ...such as a busy work week, stress, etc, I would always find some kind of stupid reason to get mad. I don't do this intentionally...I just have a tendency to magically discover a problem. And then blow it out of proportion. I would think that since he is not really talking to me, or paying attention, maybe he's not that into me. Hardly do I consider --maybe he's quiet because his mind is preoccupied with worries about work, or that he's feeling overwhelmed with life --as we all feel once in a while. I'd obsess about it, and then pull back to gain some distance. My motto has always been that having little expectation of another person will prevent me from being disappointed and getting hurt. So if someone is not paying attention to me, I will not pay attention back. (Real mature, I know).
This week, my boyfriend Adam has been really overwhelmed with work. He's got a lot to do in very little time. He didn't talk as much when we got home from work, and wasn't being very playful (hasn't tickled me in weeks!). We went to bed, and he kissed me goodnight as always, and turned over to the other side. So, instead of getting butthurt about it, I took a page from his book. As he always does when I am feeling down or anxious, I put my arms around him and gave him a tight squeeze. I rubbed his back for a while and hugged him some more. I could feel his tense body loosen up, and relaxed. And he told me how stressed out he was and began talking about all his worries and all the things he had to do. I laid there listening to him and kept rubbing his back and scratching it (just how he likes it). I could tell immediately that my small little gesture was enough to make him feel better. That was the only evidence I need. From now on, each time I am about to get defensive and take one step back, I will take a page from Adam's book and step 3 steps forward instead. I have to trust that just because someone I love isn't talking to me, it doesn't mean they don't love me anymore. All it means is that they might just need a little extra love that day.
Lee Brice - I Don't Dance
I've noticed that in the past, if a boyfriend was not paying attention to me for some reason ...such as a busy work week, stress, etc, I would always find some kind of stupid reason to get mad. I don't do this intentionally...I just have a tendency to magically discover a problem. And then blow it out of proportion. I would think that since he is not really talking to me, or paying attention, maybe he's not that into me. Hardly do I consider --maybe he's quiet because his mind is preoccupied with worries about work, or that he's feeling overwhelmed with life --as we all feel once in a while. I'd obsess about it, and then pull back to gain some distance. My motto has always been that having little expectation of another person will prevent me from being disappointed and getting hurt. So if someone is not paying attention to me, I will not pay attention back. (Real mature, I know).
This week, my boyfriend Adam has been really overwhelmed with work. He's got a lot to do in very little time. He didn't talk as much when we got home from work, and wasn't being very playful (hasn't tickled me in weeks!). We went to bed, and he kissed me goodnight as always, and turned over to the other side. So, instead of getting butthurt about it, I took a page from his book. As he always does when I am feeling down or anxious, I put my arms around him and gave him a tight squeeze. I rubbed his back for a while and hugged him some more. I could feel his tense body loosen up, and relaxed. And he told me how stressed out he was and began talking about all his worries and all the things he had to do. I laid there listening to him and kept rubbing his back and scratching it (just how he likes it). I could tell immediately that my small little gesture was enough to make him feel better. That was the only evidence I need. From now on, each time I am about to get defensive and take one step back, I will take a page from Adam's book and step 3 steps forward instead. I have to trust that just because someone I love isn't talking to me, it doesn't mean they don't love me anymore. All it means is that they might just need a little extra love that day.
 |
| Adam and Khanh at Adam's hockey friend's birthday party |
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)